Caregiver Issues

Donna Nichols • April 4, 2024
Two older women are posing for a picture together.

Do you care for an elder? Maybe it’s a family member like my situation. I’m caring for my 95-year-old mother who will be 96 in April. Do you ever find yourself losing it? I do. I find myself yelling at her, but then I wonder if I’m really yelling AT her or just yelling because she can’t hear well. Caregiving is HARD!!!!


If you find yourself losing it with your loved one, you’re not alone. I find myself losing it a lot more often than I used to. Here at Assisted Living Made Simple, we hold 4 Alzheimer’s/dementia caregiver support groups a month and while my mom doesn’t have Alzheimer’s, she does have bouts with dementia. I know the importance of taking time for yourself, but do I take time for myself? No, I don’t. I work 40 hours a week, go home, get her showered, dressed, fed, and sit with her until she’s ready to go to bed. In the morning, I get her out of bed, fed, dressed and ready for the day, then off to work and it starts all over again. On the weekends, she’s mine all day and night. It’s exhausting.


When my husband and I made the decision to move her in with us, everyone said they would be there to help us, but where are they now that we need them? I understand that we are all busy, but come on, we need a break! If you are a caregiver, you know what I mean. I have caregivers for my mother 3 – 4 hours a day, 5 days a week, so my husband has her the rest of the day. Luckily, she doesn’t require a lot of care, she’s still somewhat self-sufficient, but you must be there to make sure she doesn’t fall, and she can’t prepare her own meals or get her own drinks. She cannot shower by herself, and she needs standby assist while dressing; these two things she will only let me handle.


My only other option is having a caregiver come in on the weekend too, but that is pricey. And if I only want an hour or two it won’t work; most caregivers won’t come unless it’s 4 hours or more. I know I’m not alone out there; I know you are going through the same things I am. How are you coping with these issues? I’d really love to know; maybe your ideas can help me.


Do you have to separate holidays like I do? I have spent many holidays with just my mom and myself because my husband goes to his brothers with his children and our grandchildren, but that is too much for my mom, so it ends up just the two of us. This is so hard because you feel torn between the two. How do you cope with a situation like this? I try to put it out of my mind and think I will have other holidays with the grandkids, and they will be even more special.


This past Easter, my husband went to his brothers like usual, but my two nephews and their families came over and it was so nice; my mother was so happy to have her family there. We all ran around outside, while she sat there and watched us. She was so full of joy.


After they left, which wasn’t until around 7:00 p.m., I gave mom her shower and got her settled down. I went to take my shower and when I came out, she was in her chair fast asleep; she was exhausted. She got up in the morning and couldn’t stop talking about what a great Easter she had. It really is the little things that make a difference.



If you are dealing with some of the same issues I am, please give me a call and let’s chat. I’d really like to understand how you cope. Maybe we can help each other. 386-847-2322. 

What can a Senior Advisor do for you?

By Donna Nichols • July 17, 2025
A senior advisor is a personal guide or advocate for older adults and their families. Here’s what they can do for you: Help Navigate Options They can explain the differences between independent living, assisted living, memory care, nursing homes, and in-home care, and recommend the best option for a person's health, lifestyle, and budget. Find the Right Community or Services They often have knowledge of (and connections with) local senior living communities or services. They’ll: Match your needs to suitable options Setting up tours Even help ask the right questions Assist with Financial Planning Some advisors can help figure out how to pay for care: Understanding long-term care insurance Veterans’ benefits Medicaid/Medicare guidance Budget planning Guide Legal and Paperwork Stuff They can refer you to elder law attorneys, help with advance directives, or even help you understand contracts from senior living facilities. Support for Families They can act as a neutral third party when families struggle with decisions, easing tension and helping everyone feel informed and involved. Assist with Movers and Downsizers Some advisors have connections with movers, downsizers, and other people who can make your transition smooth.  If you believe a senior advisor can assist you, please call us today to schedule your complimentary consultation at 386-847-2322 . Our services are 100% FREE to you! What have you got to lose?

Beating the Florida Summer Heat

By Donna Nichols • July 7, 2025
Florida summers come in three flavors: hot, hotter, and what fresh hell is this? Whether you're a lifelong local or newly initiated into the Sunshine Sweat Fest, you know it’s more survival sport than season. So, how do we stay cool without losing our cool? Here’s your sun-savvy guide to getting through it. Make hydration a hobby Not just water, electrolytes are your best friends when you're sweaty. Coconut water, cucumber-mint spritzers, watermelon slices. If your drink doesn’t sparkle, chill, or drip condensation like a rom-com montage, it’s not summer-ready. Dress for success and summertime Loose, light, breathable fabrics. Cotton, linen, or the holy grail: moisture-wicking. Bonus points for sun hats and SPF clothing that make you look like a beach detective on vacation. Fans ARE your best friends Table fans, ceiling fans, handheld fans—the whole rotation. Keep them oscillating like your thoughts during a political debate. And if you’ve got a cooling towel? You’re royalty. Avoid the “Roasting Hours” From 11 AM to 4 PM, Florida turns into a convection oven. Errands, walks, and yard work? Schedule them early or late. Unless you’re trying to get baked like a Publix cookie—then by all means. Sunscreen is a lifestyle Apply, reapply, then pretend  you're an influencer and do it again. Because nothing says “I’m melting” like a shoulder burn shaped like your purse strap. Eat lightly Cold meals can be your best friend—salads, chilled pasta, and fruit-forward lunches are all options. Bonus points if you serve them on plates fresh from the fridge like the true champion you are. Rest, reset, repeat If the heat’s making you crankier than a mosquito at a citronella convention, take breaks: shade, air conditioning, quiet corners. Recharge without guilt—you’re surviving a sauna with its own zip code. Florida heat might be relentless, but so are we. With humor, hydration, and a healthy dose of stubborn grace, we ride the wave and keep the ice cubes coming. Stay cool out there, friends. You’ve got this.

Honoring Independence Day with Grace

By Donna Nichols • July 2, 2025
Not every 4th of July needs to burst with fireworks. For many older adults, especially those with tender hearing, health challenges, or a fondness for quieter joys, Independence Day can be just as meaningful in a slower rhythm. It’s the scent of something delicious simmering nearby, the comfort of a cool seat and a cherished show, and the simple dignity of being remembered; of having made it this far, with stories to tell and wisdom that still glows brighter than any sparkler. Caregiver Tips for a Thoughtful 4th: Keep things soft and soothing. Loud sounds can be jarring for seniors with sensory sensitivities, dementia, or PTSD. Choose instrumental patriotic music or old-time radio shows that bring joy without overwhelming them. Build a gentle plate. Soft, easy-to-eat favorites like tender pulled chicken, mashed potatoes, or a festive red, white, and blue parfait (layered Greek yogurt, mashed berries, and crushed graham crackers) keep things celebratory without strain. Spark memories, not stress. Bring out family photo albums, classic Americana films, or even music from their youth. Columbo, The Andy Griffith Show, or golden-age musicals can be a comforting trip down memory lane. Create rest-friendly spaces. A cozy chair near the window, a shaded seat outside, or even a reclined viewing spot for a live TV broadcast of fireworks can help them feel included without fatigue. Let them lead the conversation. Ask about what Independence Day meant to them growing up. You might discover tales of ration books, war bonds, or dancing at VFW halls. These stories are treasures wrapped in the quiet of the day.  In the end, Independence Day is about honoring resilience—the kind that’s quieter, often overlooked, but profoundly enduring. Whether you’re caring for someone, being cared for, or simply holding space for reflection, there’s beauty in choosing peace over spectacle. This Fourth of July, let’s celebrate not just the freedom of a nation but also the freedom to adapt, to rest, and to cherish those we love in the way that suits them best.
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