Caregiver Issues

Donna Nichols • April 4, 2024
Two older women are posing for a picture together.

Do you care for an elder? Maybe it’s a family member like my situation. I’m caring for my 95-year-old mother who will be 96 in April. Do you ever find yourself losing it? I do. I find myself yelling at her, but then I wonder if I’m really yelling AT her or just yelling because she can’t hear well. Caregiving is HARD!!!!


If you find yourself losing it with your loved one, you’re not alone. I find myself losing it a lot more often than I used to. Here at Assisted Living Made Simple, we hold 4 Alzheimer’s/dementia caregiver support groups a month and while my mom doesn’t have Alzheimer’s, she does have bouts with dementia. I know the importance of taking time for yourself, but do I take time for myself? No, I don’t. I work 40 hours a week, go home, get her showered, dressed, fed, and sit with her until she’s ready to go to bed. In the morning, I get her out of bed, fed, dressed and ready for the day, then off to work and it starts all over again. On the weekends, she’s mine all day and night. It’s exhausting.


When my husband and I made the decision to move her in with us, everyone said they would be there to help us, but where are they now that we need them? I understand that we are all busy, but come on, we need a break! If you are a caregiver, you know what I mean. I have caregivers for my mother 3 – 4 hours a day, 5 days a week, so my husband has her the rest of the day. Luckily, she doesn’t require a lot of care, she’s still somewhat self-sufficient, but you must be there to make sure she doesn’t fall, and she can’t prepare her own meals or get her own drinks. She cannot shower by herself, and she needs standby assist while dressing; these two things she will only let me handle.


My only other option is having a caregiver come in on the weekend too, but that is pricey. And if I only want an hour or two it won’t work; most caregivers won’t come unless it’s 4 hours or more. I know I’m not alone out there; I know you are going through the same things I am. How are you coping with these issues? I’d really love to know; maybe your ideas can help me.


Do you have to separate holidays like I do? I have spent many holidays with just my mom and myself because my husband goes to his brothers with his children and our grandchildren, but that is too much for my mom, so it ends up just the two of us. This is so hard because you feel torn between the two. How do you cope with a situation like this? I try to put it out of my mind and think I will have other holidays with the grandkids, and they will be even more special.


This past Easter, my husband went to his brothers like usual, but my two nephews and their families came over and it was so nice; my mother was so happy to have her family there. We all ran around outside, while she sat there and watched us. She was so full of joy.


After they left, which wasn’t until around 7:00 p.m., I gave mom her shower and got her settled down. I went to take my shower and when I came out, she was in her chair fast asleep; she was exhausted. She got up in the morning and couldn’t stop talking about what a great Easter she had. It really is the little things that make a difference.



If you are dealing with some of the same issues I am, please give me a call and let’s chat. I’d really like to understand how you cope. Maybe we can help each other. 386-847-2322. 

The Heart of Guidance: The Role of a Senior Advisor in Elder Care

By Donna Nichols • September 5, 2025
In a world that often moves too fast, senior advisors offer something rare and essential: time, understanding, and a steady hand. Unlike their counterparts in the business world, senior advisors in elder care aren’t focused on profit margins—they’re focused on people. Who They Are Senior advisors in this space are often seasoned professionals, caregivers, or community advocates who help older adults and their families navigate complex decisions. They may work in senior living communities, nonprofit organizations, healthcare systems, or independently. What They Do • Guide families through transitions: Whether it's choosing assisted living or downsizing a home, senior advisors help make sense of it all. • Advocate for dignity and autonomy: They ensure that older adults’ voices are heard and respected in every decision. • Connect to resources: From transportation and wellness programs to Alzheimer’s and grief support, they know where to turn. • Offer emotional support: Sometimes, the most valuable thing they offer is a listening ear and a calming presence. Why It Matters A senior advisor isn’t just a resource—they’re a lifeline. They help families breathe easier, empower older adults to make informed choices, and bring compassion into moments that can feel overwhelming. If you’re reading this and thinking, “That sounds like me,” you’re not alone. Many of us play this role informally, answering questions, calming nerves, and connecting dots. Whether you’re a professional advisor or a trusted neighbor, your presence makes a difference.  If you or someone you love is facing a big decision and could use a calm, caring guide—we’re here. No pressure, no jargon, just real people ready to help. Call us today on 386-847-2322 to start the conversation. Sometimes, the first step is simply knowing you’re not alone.

Grandparents Day: A Celebration of Heart, Humor & Heritage

By Donna Nichols • September 4, 2025
September brings a quiet kind of magic—the golden light, the hint of fall in the air, and a moment to honor the everyday heroes who’ve shaped our lives with love, laughter, and legendary stories: our grandparents. Whether you’re a grandparent yourself, a grateful grandchild, or someone who’s been “adopted” by a wise elder in your life, Grandparents Day is a chance to pause and celebrate the beautiful bridge between generations. What Makes Grandparents So Grand? • They’re walking history books—with tales of jukeboxes, moon landings, and the original recipe for Sunday gravy. • They’re master cheerleaders, showing up with hugs, cookies, and the kind of encouragement that sticks for life. • They’re wisdom whisperers, offering advice that somehow makes more sense with each passing year. And let’s be honest: they also have the uncanny ability to make you feel like the most important person in the room. A Legacy of Love Grandparents teach us that love doesn’t have to be loud to be lasting. It’s in the quiet gestures: the handwritten birthday card, the saved newspaper clipping, the way they remember your favorite snack or ask about that thing you mentioned weeks ago. They remind us that resilience is built over time—through hard work, humor, and a whole lot of heart. Their stories carry lessons we didn’t know we needed until we suddenly find ourselves living them. And for those who’ve lost a grandparent, this day can be bittersweet. But it’s also a chance to honor their memory—by sharing their stories, cooking their favorite dish, or simply whispering a thank-you into the September breeze. Celebrate with Us: A Little Fun for the Big Day This Grandparents Day, we invite you to: • Share a memory: What’s one moment with a grandparent that still makes you smile? • Send a shoutout: Post a photo or quote from your favorite grandparent on social media and tag us.

Honoring Our Elders: National Senior Citizens Day

By Donna Nichols • August 14, 2025
On August 21, we pause to celebrate the heartbeat of our communities—our senior citizens. This day isn’t just about marking a date on the calendar. It’s about recognizing the wisdom, resilience, and warmth that older adults bring to every conversation, every gathering, and every generation. Wisdom That Lights the Way From stories of first jobs and family traditions to lessons learned through love and loss, seniors carry a lifetime of insight. Their experiences are more than memories—they’re guideposts for those still finding their way. Today, we honor those stories and the voices behind them. Connection That Matters Whether it’s a neighborly wave, a shared recipe, or a quiet moment on the porch, seniors remind us that connection doesn’t need fanfare—it just needs heart. National Senior Citizens Day is a chance to say, “We see you. We value you. We’re better because of you.” Ways to Celebrate Host a storytelling circle or memory-sharing event Share a favorite photo and the story behind it Create a “Senior Spotlight” wall with quotes and wisdom Invite younger generations to learn a skill from a senior (gardening, baking, crafting) Spend time—listen, laugh, and learn A Day of Gratitude Let’s make August 21 a day of genuine appreciation. Whether you’re a senior yourself or someone lucky enough to know and love one, take a moment to reflect on the richness they bring to our lives. Their legacy is living, breathing, and beautifully unfolding every day.  This is a day to be celebrated every day! Senior citizens bring so much fulfillment to our lives, and we need to embrace the moments we spend with them, for they are precious.