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Caregiver Issues

Donna Nichols • April 4, 2024

Do you care for an elder? Maybe it’s a family member like my situation. I’m caring for my 95-year-old mother who will be 96 in April. Do you ever find yourself losing it? I do. I find myself yelling at her, but then I wonder if I’m really yelling AT her or just yelling because she can’t hear well. Caregiving is HARD!!!!


If you find yourself losing it with your loved one, you’re not alone. I find myself losing it a lot more often than I used to. Here at Assisted Living Made Simple, we hold 4 Alzheimer’s/dementia caregiver support groups a month and while my mom doesn’t have Alzheimer’s, she does have bouts with dementia. I know the importance of taking time for yourself, but do I take time for myself? No, I don’t. I work 40 hours a week, go home, get her showered, dressed, fed, and sit with her until she’s ready to go to bed. In the morning, I get her out of bed, fed, dressed and ready for the day, then off to work and it starts all over again. On the weekends, she’s mine all day and night. It’s exhausting.


When my husband and I made the decision to move her in with us, everyone said they would be there to help us, but where are they now that we need them? I understand that we are all busy, but come on, we need a break! If you are a caregiver, you know what I mean. I have caregivers for my mother 3 – 4 hours a day, 5 days a week, so my husband has her the rest of the day. Luckily, she doesn’t require a lot of care, she’s still somewhat self-sufficient, but you must be there to make sure she doesn’t fall, and she can’t prepare her own meals or get her own drinks. She cannot shower by herself, and she needs standby assist while dressing; these two things she will only let me handle.


My only other option is having a caregiver come in on the weekend too, but that is pricey. And if I only want an hour or two it won’t work; most caregivers won’t come unless it’s 4 hours or more. I know I’m not alone out there; I know you are going through the same things I am. How are you coping with these issues? I’d really love to know; maybe your ideas can help me.


Do you have to separate holidays like I do? I have spent many holidays with just my mom and myself because my husband goes to his brothers with his children and our grandchildren, but that is too much for my mom, so it ends up just the two of us. This is so hard because you feel torn between the two. How do you cope with a situation like this? I try to put it out of my mind and think I will have other holidays with the grandkids, and they will be even more special.


This past Easter, my husband went to his brothers like usual, but my two nephews and their families came over and it was so nice; my mother was so happy to have her family there. We all ran around outside, while she sat there and watched us. She was so full of joy.


After they left, which wasn’t until around 7:00 p.m., I gave mom her shower and got her settled down. I went to take my shower and when I came out, she was in her chair fast asleep; she was exhausted. She got up in the morning and couldn’t stop talking about what a great Easter she had. It really is the little things that make a difference.



If you are dealing with some of the same issues I am, please give me a call and let’s chat. I’d really like to understand how you cope. Maybe we can help each other. 386-847-2322. 

Make Valentine’s Day Special for Seniors

By Donna Nichols • February 5, 2025
Valentine’s Day tends to zero in on romantic love, but what about our seniors? They too often get forgotten. We have some ways to make Valentine’s Day special for them too. Spend the day with your loved one. Spending quality time with a loved one is more important to a senior than anything else. There is no greater gift than time and please make sure you have enough, so you are not rushed. Do your elderly loved one have a favorite meal? Perhaps you can prepare it for them, or if they are able, you can prepare it together. How fun would that be for you both? Be sure to discuss the enjoyment it brought you while you are sharing the meal together. How about a game of name that love song? You could prepare a playlist of love songs from the generation and play them to see how many they get correct. Or, if you can sing, you can sing some for them and see if they can recollect them. Take some time for reminiscing, go through old photo albums, or ask about old times. Ask them about when you were young and what trouble you caused; this will give you all something to laugh (or cry) about. Has your loved one been cooped up all winter? Take them out for a nice lunch, or weather permitting, a picnic in the park. Go for coffee and a donut, then head out to see a movie. Make a “date” of it. Maybe your senior is into crafts. You can design special Valentine’s Day cards for other family members. This way your senior can express their love for them and send it to them in their own unique way. You can create other greeting cards as well. Bake some special treats together. Does your senior have some favorite cookies or cake? You could bake it together, or you can bake it for them. Then you can enjoy it after you have the meal you prepared together. Yummy, delicious!! You can watch some romantic movies together if they prefer to stay in the house or the weather isn’t so good. If they like to color, you can buy them some of those large coloring books and you can color together. Don’t forget the decorations and the flowers! Make the house or apartment as festive as possible. Even if they live in as assisted living community, you can still decorate their room to the nines! Make it as festive as possible! If you live in another state or can’t be close to your senior for Valentine’s Day, how about sending them a specially crafted care package. You can hand make some gifts, add some photos of family and friends, and send a personally recorded message. You can bake some homemade treats and incorporate some things that are of personal interest to them. This will show how much you care for them and make their Valentine’s Day extra special even if you can’t be with them.  There are so many ways to make Valentine’s Day special for seniors. Let’s not forget about them; make sure to show them they are so loved too!

February is National Heart Month

By Donna Nichols • February 4, 2025
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Hydration Tips for the Winter

By Donna Nichols • January 8, 2025
I’ve written many blogs about the importance of staying hydrated in the summer, but did you know it’s just as important to stay hydrated in the winter months? I’ve shared some important tips on how to stay hydrated in the winter and why. Cold, dry air can dehydrate you easily and quickly. Even if you don’t feel thirsty. Proper hydration can help regulate your body temperature, maintain healthy organ function, and prevent fatigue, dry skin, and headaches. In the colder months, you do not feel thirsty, that’s why it’s so important to make sure you drink plenty of water. Why is winter hydration so important? Colder air tends to be drier causing moisture to evaporate through your breathing which can cause dehydration. In colder weather, you may not feel as thirsty, causing you to become dehydrated quickly. Also, wearing more clothing traps sweat inside your clothing causing more fluid loss. What are some of the benefits of staying hydrated in the winter? • Drinking enough water helps keep your skin hydrated and prevents dryness. This will help with that dry, itchy skin feeling we all get in the winter. • Water helps your body maintain a regular core temperature. Which is so important to maintain in the winter. • Drinking plenty of water supports your immune system, which helps fight off winter colds and the flu. We all want to fight those germs off! • When you are dehydrated, you become tired easily, so drinking plenty of water helps keep your energy levels up. How do you stay hydrated in the winter? • Make sure you drink plenty of water. Set reminders if you must; you probably won’t feel as thirsty in the winter, but you need to keep drinking that water! • You don’t have to drink cold water; room temperature water works. You can also drink tea or water with lemon, as long as you’re getting your water. • If you’re going out, carry a water bottle with you to ensure you have water to drink. • Eat fruits and vegetables that contain water. Tomatoes, lettuce, strawberries, watermelon, cauliflower, mushrooms, cucumber, apples, and pineapple are just a few that contain high water contents. • If you think you’re dehydrated, check your urine; if it’s a darker color, that can suggest dehydration. Urine should be a pale, yellow color. As you can see, staying hydrated in the winter is just as important as staying hydrated in the summer, if not more. In the winter you don’t realize you are thirsty therefore you tend not to drink as much water as you should. This has the potential of wreaking havoc on your body. Please make sure you drink plenty of water in the wintertime as you do in the summertime. We have rebranded our company, we are now Assisted Senior Services! Call us for ANYTHING SENIOR!! 386-847-2322!
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