Caregiver Issues

Donna Nichols • April 4, 2024
Two older women are posing for a picture together.

Do you care for an elder? Maybe it’s a family member like my situation. I’m caring for my 95-year-old mother who will be 96 in April. Do you ever find yourself losing it? I do. I find myself yelling at her, but then I wonder if I’m really yelling AT her or just yelling because she can’t hear well. Caregiving is HARD!!!!


If you find yourself losing it with your loved one, you’re not alone. I find myself losing it a lot more often than I used to. Here at Assisted Living Made Simple, we hold 4 Alzheimer’s/dementia caregiver support groups a month and while my mom doesn’t have Alzheimer’s, she does have bouts with dementia. I know the importance of taking time for yourself, but do I take time for myself? No, I don’t. I work 40 hours a week, go home, get her showered, dressed, fed, and sit with her until she’s ready to go to bed. In the morning, I get her out of bed, fed, dressed and ready for the day, then off to work and it starts all over again. On the weekends, she’s mine all day and night. It’s exhausting.


When my husband and I made the decision to move her in with us, everyone said they would be there to help us, but where are they now that we need them? I understand that we are all busy, but come on, we need a break! If you are a caregiver, you know what I mean. I have caregivers for my mother 3 – 4 hours a day, 5 days a week, so my husband has her the rest of the day. Luckily, she doesn’t require a lot of care, she’s still somewhat self-sufficient, but you must be there to make sure she doesn’t fall, and she can’t prepare her own meals or get her own drinks. She cannot shower by herself, and she needs standby assist while dressing; these two things she will only let me handle.


My only other option is having a caregiver come in on the weekend too, but that is pricey. And if I only want an hour or two it won’t work; most caregivers won’t come unless it’s 4 hours or more. I know I’m not alone out there; I know you are going through the same things I am. How are you coping with these issues? I’d really love to know; maybe your ideas can help me.


Do you have to separate holidays like I do? I have spent many holidays with just my mom and myself because my husband goes to his brothers with his children and our grandchildren, but that is too much for my mom, so it ends up just the two of us. This is so hard because you feel torn between the two. How do you cope with a situation like this? I try to put it out of my mind and think I will have other holidays with the grandkids, and they will be even more special.


This past Easter, my husband went to his brothers like usual, but my two nephews and their families came over and it was so nice; my mother was so happy to have her family there. We all ran around outside, while she sat there and watched us. She was so full of joy.


After they left, which wasn’t until around 7:00 p.m., I gave mom her shower and got her settled down. I went to take my shower and when I came out, she was in her chair fast asleep; she was exhausted. She got up in the morning and couldn’t stop talking about what a great Easter she had. It really is the little things that make a difference.



If you are dealing with some of the same issues I am, please give me a call and let’s chat. I’d really like to understand how you cope. Maybe we can help each other. 386-847-2322. 

How the Spring Season Helps Us Heal

By Donna Nichols • March 3, 2026
Spring has a way of softening the world. The air warms, the light lingers, and suddenly the small things — a bird call, a new bloom, a gentle breeze — feel like invitations to breathe a little deeper. For many seniors, especially those carrying grief, stress, or the weight of a long winter, March can feel like a quiet turning point. Here’s why spring so often brings emotional renewal, no matter your age. 1. Light Returns, and So Does Energy Longer days naturally lift mood. More sunlight helps regulate sleep, boosts energy, and gently nudges the body out of winter’s heaviness. Even a few minutes outside can shift the way the day feels. 2. Nature Models Healing Spring is a season of second chances. Trees bud again, flowers push through the soil, and the world rebuilds itself without rushing. For seniors navigating loss or change, this slow, steady renewal can feel reassuring — a reminder that healing isn’t linear, but it is possible. 3. Movement Feels More Natural Warmer weather encourages small steps: a walk to the mailbox, a few minutes on the porch, tending to a plant. These simple movements help ease stiffness, improve mood, and reconnect the body with the world around it. 4. Social Life Blossoms Too As the weather improves, people naturally come out of hibernation. Neighbors chat outside, community events pick up, and families gather more often. Even brief interactions can brighten a day and reduce feelings of isolation. 5. Spring Encourages Reflection — and Release There’s something about fresh air and open windows that invites a mental reset. Many seniors find themselves sorting through memories, letting go of what no longer serves them, and making space for what’s next. A Season That Meets You Where You Are Spring doesn’t demand big changes. It simply offers gentle reminders: you’re still growing, still healing, still here. Whether you’re grieving, rebuilding, or simply ready for a lighter season, March brings a quiet kind of hope — one that arrives softly and stays.

Winter Wellness: Staying Safe and Steady in February

By Donna Nichols • February 5, 2026
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February and the Heart

By Donna Nichols • February 2, 2026
Small Habits That Make a Big Difference February brings a soft reminder to pause and check in with the most loyal companion we have — our heart. It beats for us without asking, carrying us through decades of joy, loss, laughter, and change. American Heart Month invites us to honor that steady work with simple habits that help us feel stronger, more energized, and more connected. The Power of Small Steps Heart health doesn’t require dramatic resolutions or strict routines. In fact, the most meaningful changes are often the smallest ones — the ones we can weave into our day without feeling overwhelmed. A ten‑minute walk after breakfast. Choosing water before coffee. Stretching your arms and shoulders while waiting for the kettle to boil. Turning on a favorite song and letting your body sway a little. These tiny choices add up. They support circulation, boost mood, and remind us that caring for ourselves is still possible at every age. Movement That Meets You Where You Are Not everyone can take long walks or join a fitness class — and that’s okay. Gentle movement counts. • Marching your feet while seated • Rolling your shoulders to release tension • Standing up and sitting down a few times to strengthen your legs • Reaching toward the ceiling to open your chest Every bit of movement helps the heart do its job with less strain. Food That Loves You Back Heart‑healthy eating doesn’t have to be complicated. Think in terms of adding rather than restricting. • Add a handful of berries to breakfast • Add a few colorful vegetables to lunch • Add a sprinkle of nuts or seeds for healthy fats • Add one extra glass of water during the day Small additions feel doable — and they nourish the body in ways you can feel. Connection Is Heart Medicine, Too Loneliness can weigh on the heart just as much as physical strain. February is a wonderful time to reach out. Call a friend you haven’t spoken to in a while. Share a memory with a grandchild. Join a community activity, even if just for an hour. Let someone know you’re thinking of them. Human connection is one of the most powerful heart‑protective habits we have. A Month to Celebrate Your Strength Your heart has carried you through so much — every milestone, every challenge, every moment of joy. This month is not about perfection. It’s about honoring your resilience and choosing one or two small habits that make you feel good. A healthier heart doesn’t happen overnight. It happens in the quiet, steady choices we make each day. And February is the perfect time to begin.